I'm glad you were able to make some changes to it that made you happier with it! I do think you hit the nail on the head, though: when you write to order, you're writing what someone else would want to read, and it's not necessarily going to mesh with what you'd want to read ... which makes it a lot tougher in some ways.

It's great that you've found a way to make your writing work for you, regardless! And I hope that you can get to a place where you're able to both make it work and write 100% for yourself, not just to someone else's request.